18 Jan

Early this morning(330 AM early!), I laid in bed thinking about today. Today is the day that I spend my last hours being in my 20s. I can never come back to it, so I’d thought I’d just take a moment to reflect on it. What have I lost, what have I gained, what have I learned?

..It’s now January 18th… I wrote the paragraph above on the 16th, and never got to finish. So here goes…

10 years ago, I was in college, and about to graduate! I met Tran a few years earlier, and things were going great. Then I joined the wonderful engineering world, and started to earn my own cash, invest in 401k, and started saving for my first house. By 23, I finally moved out and was on my own. No one to really answer to, just living my life the way I wanted to. Of course, I always had the parents on each side of my ear quietly whispering the pros and cons of every major decision I make. Annoying, but it happens. Lots of ups and downs with the family. I lost my Uncle(my grandma’s oldest son) from a heart attack. Just crazy how things change so quickly, and how life can all of a sudden be taken away from you. That event definitely taught me to just live. Be happy and just live. There’s no time for bickering on petty shit, because it’s such a waste of time. Live your life!!

Best friends were getting married and starting to have families. Tran and I traveled a lot, and let’s just say, we love the Caribbean. Then in 2007, after 9 years of being together, we finally tied the knot. One of the best days of my life. Such a great journey for both of us. All the meetings, planning, time and money spent — all for a few hours of celebration. Celebration of life, love, and happiness. All worth it!

After a couple more years of travelling, we finally decide that it’s time to have our first baby. In October of 2009, Mason Quan Le was born, and has been a blessing every since. The crazy nursing schedule, CIO session, poopy diapers are all really worth it. My mom used to say to me – “You won’t know how it feels to be a mother until you have a child of your own”. Wow, was she right! I’ve never loved or missed someone so much. Being at work and away from your child is hard because you want to hang out with them all the time. Even though it’s hard to communicate with him at times, all those frustrations go out the window when he gives me a big smile and tries to squeeze you as hard as he can. So precious! My baby boy. Mommy loves you so much!

And here I am today, celebrating 30 years of life. When I was a kid, I thought life was so hard. Always compared myself to others. Why did I have it so difficult, and mainly it was difficult parents. I truly believed they made my life hard. I can write a whole post about this, but I’m trying to let it go, and just accept it. Although I know they were difficult and strict, they had their reasons, and usually their reasons were very valid. What I’ve learned is to just take what I think is right about them, and try to apply it to my life. And I’ll definitely take what I think is wrong about them, and try not to do the same. And no I didn’t have it hard, I just thought I had it hard. Compared to other kids out there, my life was P.E.R.F.E.C.T. and I was very lucky to have parents who provided for me.

In between all the big events that happened the past 10 years, there were definitely sad, embarrassing, fun and crazy moments that I didn’t mention. It was not all happy, I’ll tell you that. And you know what, I don’t think I’ve truly met my run of bad luck yet. I know I will one day. I keep thinking about it, when will these events occur, and how bad will they be. It’ll definitely be a test of will and strength, that I’m for sure of. Until then, I’m just going to live my life for me and my family. I think the 20s were definitely about me and growth. Now the 30s is going to be about my family, the family that Tran and I build together, and how we get through this crazy life as a family of 4.

Cheers to the new decade! I promise, no more emo posts..back to Crossfit and healthy eating. The healthy eating, I’m still working on!!!


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